I've been a little MIA..

Wow, it's been a while since I've wrote anything. I've been SO busy! I went on a mini vacation, to my parents house, in New York. I deff didn't miss that weather! It was so cold. I missed my babies so much but I had a good time. It was nice to be around family and friends and not just spend all of my day alone. 

But, I am 100% happy to be home and relaxing in my own house! 

While I was home I celebrated mine and Adam's two year wedding anniversary. I can't believe it's been that long! Unfortunately he is still deployed so we weren't able to celebrate together but he was able to talk for most of the day so that was pretty nice! I didn't do much that day. I slept most of it, actually. My mom and I ordered Chinese and watched Pretty Little Liars. And that was pretty much the whole day. Nothing spectacular, but it was still such an amazing day. 

Two Years, with forever to go! <3

The rest of the trip was spent seeing friends and family. It was great to get to go home and see everyone, just wish that Adam was able to come with me. 

But this deployment is coming to an end! 

Slowly but surely! 

Now, that I'm home and have my babies back and have everything all un-packed and organized it feels amazing to be relaxing. School starts on Wednesday again, and I'm looking forward to it because that means that the time will start to go by quicker. Which means that it will make the last hump of this deployment go by faster! 

Can't wait for it all to be over and to have my husband back at home. 

But for now, it just feels so good to be at home with my babies and relaxing. 

xoxoxo

Eighteen Days with Seventeen Days to go...

18 days, that's how long it has been since school has been over. Eighteen days. Eighteen long, boring, days that have been filled with absolutely nothing. Last Christmas break from school it wasn't so bad, but that was because my husband was home. Well, with him being deployed now things have been.... boring. And that's just saying it nicely. 

Now, don't get me wrong, I am completely capable of going and doing things so that I am not as bored as I have been. But I just find myself wanting to be pouting, all alone, in the house. So, obviously that means that I have no room to complain, right? Yeah, I know and I agree. I shouldn't be complaining. Many people have it way worse and I know that. Plus, when school starts up again I won't be bored anymore. 

It's just a rough patch, and I know that I can make it through. 

Going home at the end of the week will help. I'll finally be around family and friends and not always by myself. I'm really looking forward to it.

I'm at the halfway point of this break. I can do this. 

Once I come home from my "vaca" and school starts up again, it will already be the end of January and almost February. Meaning, another month down! Getting closer and closer to welcoming my husband home. 

Just have to keep pushing for that moment. 

But until then, I'm gonna go spend some more time on my couch doing nothing but being bored! 

xoxoxox

Ten Days until Two Years...

Wow, I can't believe that it is already been TWO years since my husband and I got married. These past two years have been full of ups and downs, heartaches and happiness, deployment and field ops, Bella and Chase, but most of all they've been filled with love. 

The love that we have for each other is just amazing. And I know, I know, how corny, right? But I'm serious. Our relationship has seen a lot of things that "normal" relationships don't. But then again, what is normal? Everyone has a different vision of what their normal is, and for us our normal includes a lot of time spent apart instead of together. But to us, that's our beautiful normal. And don't get me wrong, I would do anything to have him home with me all the time, and I know that he would love to be home more too, but right now that's just not possible. 

See, for him, his job is more than just a job. It's a way of life. His way of life. Our way of life. He's always been about the military, his whole life. It's been his passion forever, and ever since I met him it's the only thing that I've ever known him to do. We met when he was already in the Marines, actually he had just came home from his first deployment. So for me, this lifestyle with him is the only one that I have ever known. 

He still has about three years and some odd months left in this enlistment when he comes home from this deployment, and we've been talking about whether or not he should re-enlist or get out. I have mixed emotions about that. I would love to have a "normal" life with him. (and by normal I mean, not so much time spent apart) But I also know that he has so much passion for what he does and I'm not sure if he will find anything in the civilian world that he is that passionate about. And I don't want him to just settle. I want him to be happy, just like he wants me to be happy. 

It's a hard decision, one that will take a lot of thinking, but in the end I know that whatever he/we choose our life will still be as amazing as it always has been. 

Our love for each other will always be strong. 

I've been taking a lot of time today to reflect back on the past two years and I just can't believe how blessed our lives truly have been. Yeah, we've wanted to have a baby for the past two years but we are learning now that we are so lucky for not having any children yet. We want to be more ready. We want to have more experiences under our belt before we have kids. That one was a big thing for me to understand. I felt like I was broken, and I was always upset that all of my friends were having beautiful blessings from God and Adam and I weren't. But now, I realize how blessed we are for not having a baby in this stage of our life. But we are extremely eager and excited for the right time in our lives for us to welcome our own little blessing(s). 

For now though, we are just going to enjoy how amazing our lives already are. 

Here's a little flashback at the best day of my life, the day I married my best friend: 

xoxox

Be Thankful, You Are Blessed

I'm sitting here now trying to figure out what I wanna write about today in my post and I'm really not coming up with anything that I feel is necessary to be said. And for a bit I took that as a problem, as meaning that I wasn't going to be able to keep up with this blog as much as I wanted too because I can't even think of anything to write about. But then I stopped myself from thinking that way. I starting thinking about how blessed I was for not having anything to talk about. 

Now, that may sound weird, me thinking I'm blessed because I don't have anything to talk about. Well try thinking about it this way, I have nothing to complain about, nothing that is on my mind worrying me, nothing that is making today a bad day that I would want to vent about. To me, that is something to be extremely thankful for. And I am. 

Don't get me wrong, I woke up an hour earlier then I wanted too this morning with a pounding headache, Bella has been a terror all day and Chase decided to eat half of my lunch before I was able to get to it. Oh, I also spilled my entire cup of coffee on myself this morning which forced me to have to wash my couch seat covers. But despite all of this I still have nothing to talk about. That's just life. And you know what, without all of that happening today I would've had an extremely boring day. I am so thankful for all of it. 

But at the end of the day, what really matters? The coffee you spilled because your kids ran into you when you were walking with it? That you were late for work because you hit every red light? That when you get home from work you have a sink full of dishes to do? Does all of that really matter?

Try looking at it in a different way. Your coffee was spilled yes, but by your children, blessings given to you by God, that some people are unable to have. You were late for work because of the red lights? Well, you have a job and a car, two things that most Americans don't have. Oh, and that sink full of dishes, that only means that you are fortunate enough to have enough food in your house to feed your family. 

Too many people spend too much time focusing on all of the bad things in life. You're missing out on precious time. Time you can't get back. So instead of focusing on the negatives, look at the positives. 

You're alive.

You're healthy.

You're beautiful.

You're unique.

You're intelligent. 

You're you.

And that's the best you can be. 

So yeah, I may have thought that not having much to talk about was something bad at first but it's not. It just means that I am blessed enough to live a wonderful life. And I am thankful for that everyday. 

xoxox

My Advice for Military Wives...

Being a Military Wife, regardless of what branch your husband serves in, is one of the most rewarding things you will ever do. But then again, being a wife in general is one of the most rewarding things in life. At least, that's how it has been in my experience. 

Now don't get me wrong, you will do things within your life that will be rewarding and fulfilling besides being a Military Wife, like have children, adopt a pet, buy a home, get your dream job etc. So I'm not saying that being a Military Wife will be the only rewarding thing that you ever do with you life, because that just isn't true.

I've read a lot of blogs about advice for Military Wives, and a lot of them were really good. They all had really good, useful information in them. Good places to shop near each base, TMO information, what housing areas are nice/ which ones aren't, if schools are better on base/off base, etc. All good information, that I do believe is necessary to know. But this post isn't going to be about all of that, because with my own personal experience I haven't even had to use half of the things that those blogs talk about. We choose to shop at local grocery stores and not the commissary, we don't have children, and we have never needed TMO to move us, we do it ourselves. So, although I do believe that those blogs contain A LOT of very useful information it just has never pertained to my situation. But here is information that I think to be helpful when you're married to a Military man.

My top ten pieces of advice for Military wives:

1. Remember that you love the man & not the uniform: Now don't get me wrong here, we all LOVE to see our men in their dress uniforms, am I right? But that can't be the reason why you are with him, and if it is good luck with that relationship lasting. Harsh, I know. But it's true. You have to be in love with your husband for who he is, not what he does. Although having him serving our country is an extremely noble thing, you can't let that be the reason you are with him. BUT that's not to say that you can't love him MORE because of what he does. In my case, my love for my husband grows each and every time I see him advance in his job. Recently he was just promoted and he's now a Sergeant. Seeing him grow within his career is something that brings me so much joy. But I would love him if he was Sgt. Harmon or garbage picker Harmon. He's still Adam.  

2. Get used to being alone... a lot: This one is a tricky one, because I know that each job is different so time spent apart will be different for everyone. However, mostly everyone in the Military goes on deployments, whether they are combat deployments or not, they still leave for a period of time. So get used to spending some time without your s/o. I've found that going to school helps me to take up some time, and I've heard other people say that they start new hobbies, work out, get more than one job, etc. It all depends on you and your personal preference, but my advice is to find something that YOU enjoy, not what other people tell you you should be doing. If you like to stay home and watch an entire season of Law and Order: SVU on Netflix... then do it! I've done that, with multiple shows. Between school, my fur babies, and my Netflix account I'm surviving this deployment. Just find what you need to do to keep yourself busy. 

3. Learn how to say goodbye: Now, I'm not talking about saying goodbye to your husband when he leaves. That's a big no-no. That's always a "see you later". I'm talking about saying goodbye to the life you used to have, your friends from home (if you are stationed far away from home), your hometown, and all of the friends you will meet along the way. Now this goodbye isn't the traditional, "goodbye, I'll never see you again", it's more of a goodbye to the way things used to be. If you can maintain the same relationship that you have with all of your friends while you're 700+ miles away from them, then you are amazing. Seriously, you are amazing. Because let me tell you, it is very hard. I'm not saying that you wont still have those friends, because I still have all of my amazing friends, I'm just saying that life is going to get in the way... a lot. From field ops, duty, 3am wake up calls just to make it to work on time for PT, deployments, your days are going to be full and by the end of them you're going to be exhausted. Plus that list didn't even contain any of the things that you had to do for yourself/ any children you have. This also includes friends you've met each place your husband was stationed, because when you (or when they) PCS you will run into the same kinds of situations and staying in touch may be hard. But then again, everybody's experience is different.

4. Military lingo, learn it: "PT is at 0600 and it's boots and utes with formation afterwards at 0730 then chow is at 0900 until another formation at 1300, oh and my cammies need to be washed and we might be PCSing next month and BAH will be different there.." wait, what? Yeah, exactly. And that's not even the hard stuff. Wait until he starts talking to you like he talks to the guys over the radio, then things really get confusing. My best advice, when he says something you don't understand, ask him what it means. Write it down if you have too, if not keep a good mental note of it because if your husband plans on being a career Military man these are things you need to know too. And if he doesn't want this as his career, it is still good to know what he is saying when he talks to you, because trust me when he comes home from work he won't change how he talks, so pay attention and learn. 

5. Base housing, use it to your advantage: Now we've all heard the horror stories of base housing. That loud couple that lives next door that doesn't take care of their kids, or the dog a couple houses down that wont stop barking and PMO patrolling the streets but not doing anything. Well, news flash, that happens in any neighborhood.... even off base! WOAH, shocking I know. This one though, I will say, is personal preference because when you live in base housing you don't receive any BAH (basic housing allowance) BUT you also don't have to pay rent, or any utilities (minus cable). In my situation, living on base has been the best thing for us. When we were living off base, we got BAH but it was a struggle at times to come up with the money for rent, electric, water, trash, cable, car, phone, insurance, furniture payment (because we rent ours) etc. Now living on base we only pay 3 bills a month. Cable, car insurance, and furniture. Granted they took away our BAH but we are able to save SO much more because we have less bills to pay. I love our house, and I've seen other houses on base and they all have been nice. So taking away our BAH is fine with me because we have the assurance that our house will never be taken away from us if anything happens and we run short on our money. Probably the best feeling in the world. Like I said though, this one is personal preference, see what works best for you and your family. 

6. Be a mom & dad, husband & wife, man & woman; basically, have superpowers: Now we don't have any "human" children yet. And I say it like that because our fur babies are our children. And while your husband is away you will have to learn how to do everything on your own. If you have kids, you will have to be mom and dad. If not you will have to learn how to do all the "manly" jobs around the house, and trust me everything will only break/not work when he is gone. You basically have to have superpowers and learn how to do everything that you and your husband do together when he's home, alone. Because if you don't do it, who will? 

7. Never loose sight of who you are: You are your own person. You have your own dreams, goals, wishes, and none of that needs to change just because you are married to a Military man. It may make things a little bit more difficult for you to accomplish your goals in a timely manner, BUT NEVER GIVE UP. Keep pushing towards what YOU want to do with your life and don't let yourself get too swept into your husbands life/career. Now, I do not in any way mean that you shouldn't support him and the things he wants. I just believe that you can support him AND support your own goals too. Like I said, it may be hard at times (moving around, deployments, etc.) but don't give up. You need to be you, not just your husbands wife. 

8. You are not your husband: What I mean by this one is, you didn't go through boot camp, you didn't graduate and you weren't the one who went on all those deployments. DON'T WEAR YOUR HUSBANDS RANK. It's not yours. It's his. Be proud of him, be so proud of him, but do not think that because your husband is an officer that you have the right to anything. You don't. You didn't earn anything. You are no better than a PFC's wife. You are the same. The only title that you can own is the title of a wife.

9. Never unpack completely: This one is also a personal preference, but in my experience I have found (after three moves) that it's best not to completely unpack. Now, I don't mean to live out of boxes stacked up on the kitchen table, I just simply mean that if it's not a necessity don't unpack it. We have been in this house for 6+ months and we still have boxes in the garage that aren't unpacked. I should probably go through them and throw out stuff, because if we haven't needed it this long we won't need it ever. But I've found that it's best to keep your house as un cluttered as possible. Especially if you aren't in your permanent home. If you are in a permanent home and you aren't planning on moving, even if he gets orders, well then it's a different story. But to make your life easier, only unpack what you need.

10. Love with everything that you have: To me this one is the most important one. Unfortunately, in this lifestyle you never know what is going to happen. There is a chance for anything. So love with everything that you have. Argue and fight hard, but make up even harder. Don't go to bed angry. If he's deployed never get off the phone without saying I love you. Make sure you say everything that you want/need too. Don't hold back. Go on adventures. Stay in bed all day watching movies in your underwear. Cherish the time that he has at home. Drink too much and take care of each other. Let him know what he means to you, all the time. You never know what is going to happen. Now, I know that all of this is true in ANY relationship/marriage, but being part of the Military the risk is a little bit higher for bad things to happen. Scary to think about, but it's true. So love him, with everything that you have, at every moment of every day.   

Those are just some pieces of advice that I have for any Military wives that I have come up with based on my own personal experience. Like I've said though, everyone has a different experience so things may be different for you. And that's okay. To each their own. 

xoxox

First day of 2014...

 I can't believe that in 13 short days it will be mine and Adam's TWO YEAR wedding anniversary! That's crazy. It's been such an amazing journey, sharing my life with my best friend, that's truly something special. We've had our ups and downs, but who doesn't? Everyday I wake up next to him (well, when he's home that is) is such an amazing blessing and I'm so lucky that I get to do that for the rest of my life.
There was a blog floating around about how there should be an "age limit" for marriage. I couldn't believe what I was reading when I read it. Adam and I got married when we were both 21 years old. He was already in the Marine Corps for three years. Two deployments down & countless field ops. He was the most mature person I had ever met in my life. He had to be though, his job required him too. I was on school number 3 and still had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. Each school I was studying something different.(I actually didn't figure out what I wanted to do until AFTER we were married) The only thing that I was certain of in my life was how much I loved Adam, and how much he meant to me. Living my life without him just didn't seem like an option to me. I knew that many people would think that we were crazy for getting married so young, but we didn't care. We took that leap of faith and we made that commitment. Because well, IT'S OUR LIFE. We are the ones who have to live with the decisions that we make. We are the ones who go to bed at night and wake up in the morning  having to live the life that we laid out for each other. We are the ones that decided that we didn't care what anyone had to say, because we knew that our love for each other was greater than anyone's doubt.
Now, don't get me wrong. I don't think that marriage is for everyone. You have to really be committed to be with someone for the rest of your life. You have to put your spouses wishes and needs ahead of yours because making them happy will make you happy. I promise you that.You have to learn to compromise, even when you don't want too. You have to learn that arguments come with marriage, but walking away isn't a solution. You have to learn that nothing justifies infidelity, nothing. You have to learn how to share your personal space with another person, and learn to become a part of their personal space too. You have to learn that husbands won't clean up after themselves, and you will have to tell them one hundred times to take the garbage out before they throw a fit and actually do it. You will realize that marriage will be the biggest blessing in your life, aside from having children.
 But does that mean  that if you are under a certain age that you can't do all of that? Absolutely not. Age is but a number, that's it. A number that people use to determine what you can and cannot do. (drive, drink, vote, etc) but marriage shouldn't be one of those. Too many people are focusing on the divorce rate being higher now. Well, news flash, divorce happens when people are married that shouldn't be married. It can happen at ANY age. Just because people got married early does not mean that they will get divorced. Just because people got married when they were "older" doesn't mean they wont get divorced. Divorce will happen regardless of what age people got married, if those two people aren't meant to be married.
But what happened to live and let live? If two people want to jump into a marriage after dating for a couple months, LET THEM BE. They are the ones who have to live with the decisions that they are making. Plus, if they date for 5 years then decided to get married everyone would be happy for them. Well their the same people they were when they started dating, and they wasted 5 years that they could have spent married.
 What's everyone so afraid of? You only get one chance to live. Why worry so much about right and wrong? Why over think situations that don't need over thinking? Take that leap of faith. If things don't work out, move on. If they do, well then congrats you are about to embark on an amazing journey.
Stop thinking and Start Living.

xoxox